You're the smoke to my high ♥

This week has been busy.
Due to studying for exams.
But, in the end,
it feels great that exams are over!
Oh yeah, the day before having the maths exam,
went valerie house to study. But in the end we played only LOL.
only nicole guai guai study lor LOL.
I don't know when have I started to think like this,
but I feel very left out from this 'clique'
It's like I'm always the one who stands behind them,
and they're always infront talking among themselves.
And whenever there's something they wanna share,
they'd say ''Everyone can take except anabelle''
I mean, I know they're joking, but still,
I feel abit hurt. Because they ALWAYS say anabelle.
Not other people in the clique.
Is it because I'm always soft with my friends?
So should I act abit.. tougher?
but like what? bash them up or what.
But well, the best is being yourself.
But whenever I talk to them,
my mind would be ''Oh know, anabelle,
be careful with what you say'' and all that.
Due to my low self esteem.
and because of thinking that way,
I take very long to answer others,
and sometimes when they say something,
I would ''huh?'' cus I didn't listen to what they said
because I was too careful in my thoughts.
Sighhhhhhhhhhh anabellee.